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Emotional support for kids with parent who have HF


I have heart failure. My condition has deterioated and i need to go in for a work up in November to determine if i qualify to be added to the transplant list.Since I've been diagnosed (2020) my daughter has been struggling with her behavior. I have tried to get her to talk about her feelings with a therapist but it hasn't helped. She has been suspended from school and I don't know what to do to change how she feels. She says she doesn't feel life is worth living if I'm not around. I want to help her but don't know how. Do any parents on the group have any advise?


  1. Hi. I am also a parent, and (as you are experiencing) it is sometimes difficult to know how best to help a child. I think you have taken the best approach by having your daughter work with a counselor. I have my own son in counseling for issues he is dealing with. And, as you have noted, so far don't think it has been helping. Although, I have had experience various times in the past with counselors, and do know that sometimes it takes time to notice the benefits. How long has your daughter been in counseling? Also, have you talked to your daughter's doctor about this. He/she may also have ideas to help you best help your daughter? What do you think? John. community moderator.

    1. Hi John,
      Thanks for responding. She has been seeing the school therapist since ealry this year. She is an excellent student and is polite in class, good at everything, participates and everything. The therapist told me my daughter was trying to find her identity. I will bring the matter up with her again but I'm at a loss. She has been eating cannabis sweets and cookies which is illegal. It's serious. I'm really uncertain what to do. With the exception of my health she claims nothing has happened that causes this behavior or stresses her.

      This is so scary and worrying 😟.

      1. Being a teenager and going thru possibly losing her mother on top of all the emotions teenagers go thru anyway could be devastating. She needs constant support, reassurance, lots of love and quite frankly the truth about your prognosis to get her through this. This will be tough on you going through heart failure as well. You don't need the added worry of family or any worry for that matter with heart failure. I know, I am on the final phase of getting added to the list for a transplant or an LAVD. Luckily, my son is grown but it does not make it any easier on family. I find that I am the one who has to be strong.......because others are not. So, I demand tough love and do not allow anyone to cry around me, or be sad. I stay away from emotional shows and movies, and I have to keep my emotions in check or I will lose it. Your daughter is going through a lot and needs to be watched......drugs, alcohol, bad friends, etc. could take your daughter down the wrong path. She has a good excuse..... worrying about you. Having a pet to take care of is one way of coping. I have two pups who love me and can't live without me and they make me get up in the morning. My husband had his colon removed two years ago and we had saved a pup and adopted her just before his surgery. She kept my mind in focus and kept some of the worry away and gave me another focus. I pray for you and your daughter and that you both keep each other comforted. Discussing your situation with each other, and crying together could make you stronger. Give her plenty to do to help you and hopefully it will keep her out of trouble. My husband does more and more for me now.

        She sounds like a great kid and very intelligent. Talk to her......
        Over two months ago I was scared and almost lost my mind with the thought of a new heart or an LAVD but I have since accepted it. You cannot worry about things that are out of your control. Best Wishes to you and your daughter.

        1. Morning Gracie, your words are so encouraging. We have been talking more and doing more things together. I really appreciate the advice. My daughter is off to high school next year and I'll be keeping a close eye on her. I pray everything goes well for you. May God make it easy for you and give you the strength and courage to continue the good fight. God bless you and everything of the best for the new year !🙏 ❤️ 🌼

          1. I wanted to make sure you saw this lovely message from 😀 -Jessica, Team Member

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